Friday, March 28, 2014

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Grandma and great grandma in town. Sleeping 4-5 hrs at night =)

And Antonella...

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Saturday, March 22, 2014

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Grandpa in town, baby acne, lost umbilical cord.

Saturday, March 15, 2014

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Hospital visit, no fun. Spinal tap

Saturday, March 8, 2014

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Emiliana - Week #1 

The first week with Emi was amazing. Most of the time it was just the 4 of us and Antonella had a chance to really meet her sister and talk to her and kiss her and scare her.

We only stayed in the hospital for 24 hours so most of the week was spent at home enjoying being a family of 4. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
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Here is my belly progression. I didn't get to finish Emiliana's letter before I had so I wrote it a few days after she was born and then finished it a couple days later. I love seeing my belly grow as Antonella grew and changed. Time is one incredible thing.

Emiliana, my love! When I found out I was pregnant with you I felt love, an indescribable sense of absolute, immense love. It was just so different and new for me.

I had always heard that with second children parents worry during pregnancy about being able to love that second kid as much as they love the first, fears that are dissipated by the arrival of an amazing second baby. But that wasn't the case for me, when I found out I was pregnant with your sister Antonella I wasn't sure about children, I had never really been around all that many of them so I wasn't sure I was "built" to be a mom, and beyond that, to be a good one. When she was born I was surprised by how much I loved her and how that love was unlike anything I had ever felt. It was impetuous and fierce, I laid staring at her with your dad by my side, and I started drowning in this new feeling, knowing we belonged to each other and all was going to be perfect.

And then I spent 9 months with her, my heart no longer belonged to me, day after day I found myself submerged deeper and deeper in this new feeling, and willingly I succumbed to the overpowering strength of my love for her. When I found out I was going to be a mom of 2, I already knew I could love the way only parents know how to, with incommensurable passion and desperate fervor. And I loved you in my belly, and I knew I wouldn't be surprised once I met you.

Boy was I wrong! I was the first person you ever touched, and as my hand met your head I was engulfed by a new kind of love I had never felt before. Once again I was taken aback by motherhood and as your chest laid on my chest I loved you uniquely. You fit so perfectly, you belonged so wonderfully, I couldn't believe we had lived without you.

Emiliana, I am so humbled God would entrust me with you, you are a precious gift and I just pray God grants your Poppa and I the wisdom to treat you as such all the days of your life.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

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Baby L #2 - Week 42

Weight - +31 lb 
Inches - 
14.5 inches 
Like -  
Lemonade, lemonade, lemonade. I can't have enough
Dislike - Coughing

We patiently waited and waited and waited and waited and Emiliana never came. At our last doctor's appointment we were told Friday at 9am Emiliana would be induced. So I hope she would come before that and as the days got closer and closer to Friday I realized I was so scared to get induced. What does being induced even mean? how does it look like? will it make the contractions worse? crazier? easier? 

On Thursday night I texted a few of the ladies I always text when I need prayer and I asked them to pray (all of this while laying on the floor because my back hurt, crying because I was scared). And within minutes I felt peace, I just suddenly knew it would all be fine. Caleb came home, prayed with me and then took Antonella to give me some time by myself and I sat in Emiliana's living room dreaming about the insane reality that it was the last night of my life with just one daughter. 

Caleb got home, we did all the things we do before we put Ant to bed and then we talked to her for a while about what was going to happen the next morning, and she talked her beautiful gibberish back and then started dancing to the music we had in the background. For the last night in Antonella's life she was going to be an only child. 

Most nights in life are pretty uneventful, but  the night of Thursday, February 27 was beautiful. God moved me from fear to absolute rejoicing and excited expectation within minutes and I went to bed knowing Emiliana was more His than she will ever be mine, and my life was about to be more colorful and beautiful by her arrival.